Talking to Family Members

How to Talk to Your Family About Your Mental Health

Talking about mental health is never easy—and it can be especially difficult when it comes to sharing with people you love. Even though discussing mental health is more accepted than ever before, admitting you’re struggling or need help can still result in feelings of vulnerability and insecurity.

However, speaking out can be an important step. Without opening up about the things you’re experiencing, those closest to you may never know what you’re going through or be able to help you get the support you need. If you’re struggling with how to tell your parents you have anxiety or how to tell your parents you’re depressed, this guide can help you find your voice.

Potential Challenges in Talking About Mental Health

There are many reasons it can be hard to talk about mental health. In some circles, it’s still quite stigmatized; from public perception to self-stigma, mental health challenges can still be incorrectly perceived as lesser or a sign of weakness. This is particularly true for those who simply aren’t educated in the realities of mental health and the validity of treatment. Due to fear of being judged—both personally and professionally—many people find it hard to talk about mental health in a way they can be sure will be safe and supported.

In spite of this, talking about mental health is a critical step, particularly for those who need treatment.

How to Prepare

Before sitting down to tell your parents you’re depressed or facing other mental health symptoms, take the time to prepare. You can do this in a few different ways, like:

  • Taking notes on talking points on the things you want to emphasize, like your most significant feelings or therapy ideas
  • Practicing what you want to say, either to a trusted person who already knows and sympathizes with what you’re going through or to yourself in a mirror
  • Doing research about strategies that have worked for others, like particular phrases people in your position have used to appropriately communicate feelings
  • Starting with peers or friends who are less likely to be judgmental

However you choose to prepare, be sure you give yourself enough time so you’re comfortable in what you’re going to say and how you’d like to say it.

Starting the Conversation

When you have done enough preparation and are ready to talk, make sure you find the right time and place. While the ideal approach will vary based on who you’re talking to and your relationship with them, it’s important to have enough time to communicate your message, as well as to do so in a place where you won’t be interrupted. You may also want to let your family member know that this is a serious topic and you’d like their attention and respect.

When you start talking, get to the heart of your message sooner rather than later; stalling and talking in circles can minimize the impact of what you have to say. Be open, honest and as vulnerable as you’re comfortable being to keep the conversation on the right foot.

Dealing With Different Reactions

In an ideal world, your family will embrace you and help you get the care you need, but this may not always be the case.

Some may be surprised, whether in a positive or negative way. They may blame themselves for not seeing the signs or express sadness that you’re feeling the way you are. Others may be hurt you waited to tell them or offended that you’re asking for help that goes beyond what they can do for you. And, tragically, there’s always a chance you’ll face resistance, denial, frustration or even anger.

Regardless of the reaction you’re met with, it’s important to keep calm. Stick to your convictions—you know what you need, and even the most aggressive response won’t change that. It’s okay to be emotional; talking about these kinds of topics can be overwhelming, particularly when a conversation isn’t going the way you hoped or expected.

At the end of the day, you expressed your feelings, you were honest with yourself and those you love and you found the courage to share your story. Even if the response isn’t what you were hoping for, you should be proud of yourself for owning your mental health needs.

How to ask parents about therapy isn’t something that’s natural or easy. And, unfortunately, some family members may not react in the kind or supportive way you need. Despite how far we’ve come in seeing mental health on the same plane as physical health, not everyone is there yet.

However, this doesn’t mean you can’t seek help on your own. The process can be overwhelming, but with the right resources, you can take the first steps on your path to healing. Contact us today to learn more about how to find the perfect approach to care.