Mark Twain famously said, “I can live for 2 months off a good compliment.” Do you feel that way? Do you remember when someone told you something kind or specifically praised your hard work?
Positive reinforcement has a significant benefit on your overall mental well-being. Sincere praise can lighten someone’s mood, inspire harder work and improve motivation, whether at work or at home.
There’s a science behind the power of praise. Positive reinforcement psychology links a direct connection between receiving a compliment and the release of dopamine (the “feel-good” hormone) in the brain. Dopamine doesn’t just lift your mood; its positive effects on your body range from boosting your memory and sleep hygiene to improving blood flow and digestion. It even increases your ability to focus. So praise can actually help you physically.
Positive reinforcement can help improve mental health. Let’s dive deeper into why praise is so important in maintaining healthy friendships.
The Powerful Impact of Praise
Praise feels good, and when we receive kind words or acknowledgment of our hard work and success, our brain releases dopamine. Because this feels good, your brain encourages you to repeat the actions that resulted in initial praise. This is positive reinforcement, a type of behavior modification technique that teaches someone to exhibit desired behavior.
What we focus on, we often make a habit. When we actively praise others, pointing out positive actions and desired habits, they often continue the behavior.
Did you know it’s not just the person who receives the compliment who gets a dopamine boost? When you express appreciation or approval of someone’s hard work or efforts, your brain releases dopamine, too. It seems like people are just hard-wired to want to make others feel good!
So, genuinely appreciating your friends or pointing out qualities you respect and admire in them creates stronger bonds between the two of you. You can improve your relationships by actively praising your friends.
The Significance of Positive Reinforcement
Positive reinforcement usually has a better outcome of producing desired behaviors in others than criticism or reprimands. When someone criticizes you, do you feel defensive or personally attacked? Even if it’s “constructive criticism,” it may still be upsetting.
Bringing specific attention to what you appreciate about your friends creates a self-fulfilling cycle of acting more positively. For example, if you often turn to your friend for support when you’re feeling stressed, you may praise them by saying something like, “Thank you for always being a good listener when I need a shoulder to cry on. I feel safe talking to you, and you always respect my feelings.”
Benefits of Praise in Friendships
Do you want to strengthen your friendships? Sincere praise for qualities you love about your friends can help you do so. You may worry that you’re “training” your friends, but that’s not the case. You’re looking for ways to make your friends feel good about themselves, and maybe you want to honor some of the things that make your friendship special.
How Can I Incorporate Praise in Friendships?
Six Practical Tips You Can Use Today!
So, you want to learn how to include more praise and positive reinforcement in your relationships but you’re unsure how to get started. People can tell the difference between sincere appreciation and hollow flattery, so follow these six tips to learn how to praise effectively:
- Be sincere. If you honestly admire a quality about your friend, your tone of voice and body language will convey this, along with your words.
- Be specific. Instead of saying, “You’re so smart,” consider being more specific about how your friend is intelligent. You could say,” I enjoy your insight into politics; you always have something thoughtful to contribute.”
- Be in the moment. Praise immediately after your friend says or does something you admire or enjoy.
- Be consistent. Praise your friends often, building a habit of drawing attention to their best qualities.
- Praise creativity, originality and effort. Praising what someone has done or accomplished often has better results than praising something they didn’t earn or do themselves, such as how they look.
- Seek to inspire. You want your friends to achieve more and be more, so your praise could be an inspiration for them to self-motivate.
Do You Need More Help Improving Your Relationships?
Did you know that a therapist can help you improve your friendships and relationships? If you’re struggling with maintaining friendships or have trouble making friends, a therapist specializing in relationships may be able to help you learn how to have more confidence in building friendships or identifying toxic relationships that could be holding you back.
The mental health hotlines on our page connect people in need with the right services to meet their mental health challenges. A trained professional is on the other end of the phone or texts 24 hours daily. They offer a confidential, safe space to discuss developing friendships or other relationship stressors. Your mental well-being is important, and we can help.