Hoarding disorder can have a devastating effect on a person’s quality of life and relationships. Relatives and spouses of hoarders find living with them especially frustrating. But even if you’re not sharing their home, watching someone you care about slowly burying themselves underneath endless clutter can be disheartening. Learning how to help a hoarder may feel impossible. But like most other mental health conditions, hoarding disorder can be treated, and there are steps you can take to support a loved one struggling with this condition.
Is Your Loved One a Hoarder?
The International OCD Foundation estimates that up to 6% of the world’s population suffers from hoarding disorder. While people can start showing symptoms as early as their teens, the condition gradually worsens as they age.
People with hoarding disorder find it impossible to let go of possessions, regardless of their value. Over time, a person with this mental health condition can accumulate items such as newspapers, knickknacks and even trash, cluttering their living space to the point of turning it into a health hazard.
Symptoms of Hoarding Disorder
Being disorganized or having a few boxes of useless stuff in their garage doesn’t always mean someone has a disorder. Hoarding becomes an issue when the accumulation of useless possessions starts getting out of control and leaves the person unable to function or use their living space. Some signs of hoarding disorder include:
- Excessive acquisition. They constantly bring new items into the home without having the space to store them.
- Difficulty discarding items. They refuse to let go of possessions, regardless of their usefulness or value. The thought of getting rid of belongings can cause them immense stress and anxiety.
- Cluttered living space. The accumulated items have taken over the home to the point where areas such as the kitchen are unusable.
- Emotional attachment to items. They may insist items have sentimental value or may become useful in the future.
- Social isolation. They might refuse to invite anyone into their home out of fear of judgment.
How to Help a Hoarder
While hoarder houses have been portrayed as quirky curiosities in the media, this disorder impacts the lives of those affected. For loved ones, witnessing hoarding can be incredibly frustrating and distressing. Living with a hoarder may leave you feeling helpless or resentful of constantly navigating a clutter-filled home. You may feel like your loved one chose random items over your well-being. The health and safety risks can also cause concerns and become a source of endless conflict.
Even when previous attempts at assisting a hoarder have failed, there are steps you can take to try to help your loved one:
- Communicate openly. Engage in nonjudgmental conversations about their hoarding. You could try asking them about each item and showing them you want to understand its significance.
- Avoid cleaning behind their back. Clearing up the clutter without their consent will only offer a short-term solution. Your loved one might feel betrayed by the gesture and will inevitably start to reacquire “lost” possessions.
- Encourage them to get mental health treatment. The attachment to clutter is only one aspect of the condition. Without professional hoarding disorder support, long-term behavioral change is unlikely. In therapy, they can explore the underlying cause of their condition and learn coping tools to help manage it.
- Respect their autonomy. Forcing someone to discard items can be traumatic and counterproductive.
- Create a clutter-free area. Insist on creating clutter-free spaces within the home. It could be a small area such as a coffee table or an entire room such as the bathroom.
- Don’t neglect yourself. Having a hoarder in your life can be draining. Try not to fall into the trap of only focusing on their recovery. You can get therapy yourself or join a support group for people with similar struggles.
- Be patient. Recovery from hoarding disorder takes time. Be there emotionally and practically for your loved one, but don’t expect instant change.
Hoarding is a challenging mental health condition to tackle. People with hoarding disorder can be resistant to treatment and firmly refuse help. Even after you’ve tried everything you could, your loved one might still reject the idea of change. Unless someone with a hoarding disorder wants help, forcing change is impossible. Sometimes, you may need to protect your mental well-being while leaving the door open for when or if they’re ready to commit to recovery.
Get Help Today
If someone else’s hoarding is affecting your quality of life, you’ve reached the right place. Our caring and compassionate team at the Mental Health Hotline is ready to take your call 24-7 and help you find resources in your area and support for your family. Get in touch today and start the journey toward a clutter-free life.
